Hi Michael,
I used to have a 2.5 AWD of a similar year, with a manual gearbox. It used to idle just under 900 rpm - so that's OK.
On the acceleration, I sometime had a small check, as it were, if I floored it in 2nd or 3rd. I adjusted my driving to accommodate it and if I wanted to accelerated very quickly I would keep the revs high and change gears quite gently taking it into neutral rather than in one sharp movement. I never used to accelerate hard from 3rd - as I thought the same as your wife.
Regards,
Peter.